How Cold Is It?

-It's so cold that it actually warms up at night.
-It's so cold that I could have won a million dollars and not know it because walking to the mailbox is out of the question.
-It's so cold that I have blankets hanging over the sliding glass door to prevent draft.
-It's so cold that I'm actually excited about finally losing the negative sign on the weather forecast, even though it will still be well below freezing.
-It's so cold that we lost our water for almost an entire day.
-It's so cold that I'm spending more gasoline warming up my car than I am driving it.
-It's so cold that today at work, I started planning a way that we could move to Australia to offer summer camps there during the northern winter months.
-It's so cold that it took me days to finally take out the trash. And the trash can is right next to the door.
-It's so cold that I go to bed early. I don't fall asleep any sooner; I just like the warmth of the blankets.
-It's so cold that I'm purposely trying to bake in the oven so I can stand by it as the warm air comes out.
-It's so cold that I have to walk around my entire car in the morning, testing to see which door I can get in from. (Sometimes it's only the back hatch.)
-It's so cold that I'm done writing this post. I need to find some ways to warm up!